"The door swings open. Smiles spread, as eyes adjust. Bright blues glisten as I blush. His sweet greeting tugs at me, bringing time back to reality. Music that has been playing all along, finally reaches my ears. He grabs each hand, pulling me close and begins to dance. Away float my fears."
When it comes to things said in the past, do we always have to hold onto them? A promise you made yourself, or maybe not even as extreme as a promise, but something you told yourself over and over again. Can you let it go? A contradiction to your current situation, you were naive when you said it, so why does it still pull at you? Maybe part of you wishes it were true, but there are also endless reasons why you're thankful it isn't. So when it comes to a past promise made on a whim, do we have to hold tight to it or can we let our present life begin?
When it comes to disagreeing is there ever a time where you don't fear you will lose the other person in the end? Sick-to-your-stomach-guilt. The voice in your head talking nonstop. "You are the one with all the issues". "Why would they want to stay"? Does there ever come a point where you don't feel this paralyzing fear that if you disagree or have an issue with something they will leave? Or do we over compromise and lose ourselves instead? When it comes to fights does does there always have to be a loss?
When it comes to planning out love is it ever a good idea? Or is our want to plan just a subconscious foreshadow of whats to come. Are we simply just trying to cover up the inevitable by talking about what we would like to happen to make ourselves feel better? Because we always know right? When you meet someone within the first date or time together you know. We often times don't like admitting this to ourselves for lack of wanting to start all over again. But what about when we don't feel the need to plan or don't want to for fear of "jinxing it". Are we also trying to hide something? Maybe we don't see this going anywhere? Or maybe, we feel so comfortable due to just knowing that we don't need to plan. Planning when you know about someone would be like a stranger telling you the grass is green. Its obvious. Often times when a not so good relationship ends somebody will always say "I had a feeling they weren't right from the beginning". If this is true why do we sing ourselves a song we know is impossible to finish? Maybe we need to learn something? Maybe the thing we need to learn most is when we actually know vs. when we act like we know.
Avoiding marriage. Avoiding aging. Avoiding work. Avoiding calling that one person back. Avoiding conflict. Avoiding let-downs. We are always avoiding something, some reasons are valid and avoiding whatever it is actually aids in making our life happier. But what about the other stuff we avoid? Are we just too lazy to deal with it? Or does the constant circle of fear berating our minds cause us to avoid the hell out of the situation? Possibly it's a fear you have grown accustomed to be scared of. Then again it could just all be in your head, which is what fear is in the first place right? The act of avoiding something out of pure angst that something negative will happen in return. What if we get out of our heads for a bit and stop always assuming the negative?
Take pride in how far you have come and have faith in how far you can go