When we can't seem to get out of our own way and keep repeating the same mistake over again maybe there needs to be a change in our thinking. Not in the obvious ways because had we been able to do that, we would have. It seems as thought there are some stuck, unable to get out of their own way. When this happens perhaps we should start thinking about our inner-selves. To think about would we allow someone to treat the child version of ourselves this way? We then take the attention off ourselves, where we can easily make an excuses, and instead turn over to protector mode. To change the way we allow people to treat us as if it were happening to ourselves as the little beings we once were. The more innocent, naive versions that need protecting. They are in all of us, they are the reason we get hurt in the first place. Maybe we should start acknowledging our inner child to grow into our adult being.
"Just because you're beautiful doesn't mean you can treat people like they don't matter." Ok, so yes this quote is from the movie 10 Things I Hate About You, and yes it came out a while ago, but this quote still pertains to relationships today. It seems as though today there are so many women who are beyond beautiful and have no clue. Yet it appears if a guy has any sort of inclination he is attractive he instantly starts playing the field and using girls. Your looks shouldn't affect how you treat people. In the end looks will fade, and then what will you be left with?
Do we give people passes because we believe if they act "this way" it would be perfect. Or we are convinced that we are meant to be with them and so we let them walk all over us. We all of sudden change what we originally set out to do because they don't want to do that or feel that way. What if you have this indescribable chemistry with them? Or could it be that your the only one that feels it and that's why your left scratching their name off a seemingly never ending list of unworthy prospects? Do we keep people around longer than we should because of the fictional fairy tale in our heads?
So many women today walk around wondering if they are "good enough". Since when did we begin to believe that we aren't worthy of having love and light in our life? Why do we do this to ourselves? We need to gain more confidence! Instead of walking into a room wondering if anyone likes us, how about we walk in wondering if we like anyone? Many complain about men not treating us right, but we are the ones who control how we are treated. So we are allowing all of this, yet we complain about it all day long. What would happen if we acted like queens? A queen wouldn't deal with bullshit from anyone. They sure as hell wouldn't even think about feeling unworthy. Rather than trying to "keep" a man, a queen would question if he was doing enough to keep her. It's time we flip our logic and put our crowns on. We are such amazing mothers, daughters, sisters, wives and friends, that deserve to let our inner queens out!
You never "had" me,
you never will.
I am not to be
You have the nerve to
away for someone
to "have" me
It was never your permission
nor will it ever be
you don't hold me.
You play your games
while I walk away,
you can watch me leave,
I know you'll enjoy it.
When you start to attach yourself to someone after a short period of time, is it really them that you're attached to? Or is it that new bubbly feeling? The one you get in your stomach, like butterflies but more intense. It slowly spreads throughout your body whenever you are with that person or talking to them. After a while it becomes a high, you don't ever want to stop. You always need that next hit. When you say you are over them, still some part of you wants more. But you don't want them back, just that bubbly feeling. "Sometimes it's not the person you miss. It's the feeling you had when you were with them".
When first getting to know someone safety is always a big factor, especially for women. Since I am on a college campus this is definitely a subject prominent in my brain. Now I completely understand that guys don't have to deal with this as much as women, and therefore they think we can be a bit over-dramatic at times. But, I would personally rather come off as over-dramatic to someone and be safe than throw caution to the wind and possibly be taken advantage of, or hurt in some way. Especially when the relationship is new! If a man ever has the nerve to tell you that you are being paranoid or crazy for not wanting to walk alone, in the dark, to meet him at his place, then screw him. My personal safety is first and foremost, and I shouldn't have to justify that. Have the decency to understand my point of view and that women get taken advantage of everyday no matter where they are. Just as an ending note, would you ever make your mother or little sister walk in the dark alone to come meet you and then call them paranoid if they didn't feel safe?
We all want someone to care. Someone to treat us like we are irreplaceable . To make it seem like we are here for a reason. And that reason is to find them and create a home within another brilliant creature. To not feel alone, to feel as though someone understands us. That even with our insecurities or quirks this person loves and cherishes every moment they have with us. That even when times are tough and it feels like we are drowning they are the only person that is inevitably able to make it better. Isn't that what everyone's life goal is? Maybe not the only thing they want in life, as it shouldn't be, but at the same time it's still important. Whether you only have a brief moment with them or a lifetime it is inevitably a blessing. To feel we are not just a waste of space but rather someone's star in the sky.
Take pride in how far you have come and have faith in how far you can go