I was going to write a post about how I want to lighten up a bit more in my posts. Feeling almost like I am this huge burden to everyone for bringing in these ideas that aren’t rainbows and sunshine all the time. What many of you probably don’t know is that I am a very fun loving person and am super silly and sarcastic... which is why I began this blog in the first place. It was (and still is) my outlet. To release the thoughts that run around my brain that aren’t exactly part of this “persona” of who I am or want to be. However I decided against writing this guilty/self deprecating post for two reasons. One, I am realizing that even though a lot of my posts can be more serious…that is okay. It is okay to have a serious side! I don’t have to be goofy and laughing every second of every day, nor do I want to be that way. I want to be well rounded, knowing when to crack a joke, when to hold someone’s (or my own) hand in solace and when to smile as big as the sun. THATS who I want to be. So who cares if this blog is only a portion of my life? I bring in the happy in talking about love and life as well. I know I am whole in a completely different way.
Then I came across this post on Pinterest and just like a perfect puzzle piece it put into words exactly how I was feeling:
“The ocean does not apologize for it depths and the mountains do not seek forgiveness for the space they take, and so neither shall you”
It has been really hitting me lately how much I apologize for things. ESPECIALLY taking up space or feeling like I am in some way a burden with my emotions. Then I started to notice the commentary in my head….“Sophia nobody wants to hear about all your feelings”, “nobody cares” or “you’re too much”. Feeling that I was too different in the emotions I feel or that I felt too much. "Sophia the average person doesn't (or appears not to) give two seconds to the things that ruminate in your head get over it"! Then I came across this quote and for just one sentence it packs a punch. I need to stop being my own worst enemy and making myself feel horrible for being human because like it or not I am one. We all have emotions, changes of heart, regrets and days we are too sensitive we feel we may break. We are human. Love that.
Take pride in how far you have come and have faith in how far you can go